Visa Vie

Everything revolved around the match, and although Djim didn't enjoy football, being the legend he is he attempted to put an excited face on for my sake. But there were days to kill before then, and after a listless couple spent in Djim's luxury Ducha he was back to work and that meant I had to finally tackle Moscow. On Tuesday I was awoken early with what was to become a running joke (not that I find anything funny at that time in the morning), the soft rap of knuckles against the door and the heavily Russified "Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike... Wek up!". I dutifully obeyed and was within the hour queuing at one of two tiny windows of the packed Kruskovo ticket booth, "Moskva Pashalsta".

Unfortunately I had timed it badly and boarded a packed train, destined to stand the remainder of the 50 minute journey. Still, making good work of it with my MP3 I stepped off and found the underground, which at first glance was a squalid affair compared to the grandiose structures in St Petersburg. Dirty faces lined the walls, some squatting on their haunches - a now reassuringly familiar sight in Russia. Switching my bag to my front and going into paranoid traveller mode I found the line I wanted and got on it, only to get lost a couple of times before reaching my destination. the underground was a world away from that of SPB. A humid, crammed, stuffy and confusing affair that sapped a day's energy away in a matter of minutes and once off I located a park bench and dozed for an hour.

Yes it's fair to say Moscow confused me that first day, and I didn't see the best of it mainly due to the 'travel admin' I had accumulated. As previously mentioned on the blog I had failed to register my visa correctly in St Petersburg. I had tried, but to a solo, non-Russian speaking traveller the task was one of the most frustrating I have ever attempted, and once the blank faces had taken me past my 3-day limit (explained below) I had stubbornly (in true Russian style) refused to try again. One Russian host described the whole affair:

"The registration paperwork impossible to keep in order, for a citizen or a tourist. I live in Moscow but not strictly legally as I am not registered here. I cannot register here because I am registered in a different town and hence should not technically be living here. I would say that roughly 80% of Russians living in any major city are living here without the proper paperwork for this or that. It is kept this way so that if for any reason they need to have something on you, they do."

So here's the thing: Russian visa regulations (as far as I could understand them) stipulated that a traveller must register their presence with the local authority within 3 working days of arrival in any town or city. I was determined to get at least 2 registration stamps, which is what some travel sites were recommending as the very least for your visa to look legitimate. However, now that I had screwed up my SPB registration I was potentially looking at a $500 fine and possible detainment no matter how many registrations I accumulated, and the debacle was far from over.

I trudged to several different offices all over the city in search of the precious stamp. In all it took me 3 solid days of metro, walking, wild goose chase after wild goose chase until I found myself downstairs, waiting in a queue with my passport finally accepted. Upon getting to the front of it the lady realised what I was actually asking for and with apologetic laughter told me they were a driving school and thought I wanted a license. I slumped down, 3 wasted days in a major city that I just wanted to explore had taken its toll.

Seeing that I was approaching wits end and speaking some basic English she sat me down with tea and cake and picked up the phone. A few calls later and she had found me an address. After triple checking the directions I set off thanking the girls profusely and found the place, handing in my passport in good time to keep my arrangement to meet Bastian in Red Square for the champions league final.

I've never known such an unnecessary and complete WASTE of time for traveller and those who have to administrate this completely baseless rule. Supposedly brought in to combat terrorism by keeping tabs on the whereabouts of foreigners I would question the difference it has made. It indeed seems as foolish as the random stop and check passport control that the police employed so regularly to anyone with slightly dark skin and dark hair (potential terrorist) or any male under 24 (potential draft-dodger). A friend with dark skin and hair was stopped 4 times in a week and fined on each occasion totalling $400. He had not completed proper registration due to various meetings attempting to ensure clean drinking water for children in Nizhny Novgorod.